Author Archives: Dann Gire

Cowboy Woody (Tom Hanks) calls for help on Chatter Telephone (Teddy Newton) in the sequel “Toy Story 3.” I realize that only baby boomers might get this reference, but “Toy Story 3” features a horrific, white-knuckle survival sequence that packs as much raw power as the single gunshot that killed Bambi’s mother. Yes. Bambi’s mother. […]

When you think about it, a lot of places can tell filmmakers how to make movies: Columbia College. UCLA. USC. NYU. But how many of them can tell filmmakers ways to avoid bad reviews of their movies? I can. I offer 100 ways to warn filmmakers – beginners and veterans – on how they can […]

Face (Bradley Cooper), left, joins Hannibal (Liam Neeson) as members of “The A-Team,” an update of the 1980s TV series. “The A-Team” doesn’t just kill. It overkills. In a good way. Sometimes. As directed and cowritten by Joe Carnahan, maker of the unlikeably nasty and stylistically choked “Smokin’ Aces,” the silver-screen incarnation of the 1980s […]

“Splice” Director Vincenzo Natali relaxes at Chicago’s Trump Towers between interviews for his new science-fiction horror tale. Director a splice of life Detroit-born Vincenzo Natali has directed four features so far, the last one being “Splice,” a science-fiction thriller that opens today. The filmmaker now makes his home in Toronto, Canada. He recently came to […]

A record label junior executive (Jonah Hill), left, tries to keep rock star Aldous Snow (Russell Brand) on time for his concert tour in “Get Him to the Greek.” “Get Him to the Greek” is another vulgar, laugh-your-head-off adult comedy from the Judd Apatow School of Offensive Humor Redeemed by Icky Characters You Slowly Learn […]

“Marmaduke” (voiced by Owen Wilson) and Carlos the cat (voiced by George Lopez) head to California for stupid pet tricks. “Wait for it,” the Great Dane tells us. “Wait – for – it!” Then he passes doggy gas on his human owners, who cough and choke on his bodily discharge. “Marmaduke” begins this way, and […]

A human-made creature named Dren (Delphine Chaneac) confronts her creator (Sarah Polley) in the thriller “Splice.” Right after I saw Vincenzo Natali’s bizarre little science fiction film titled “Splice,” I ran into fellow critic Roger Ebert and told him that after “Mommie Dearest,” this could be the nastiest Mother’s Day movie ever made. Ebert applauded […]

George Romero has firm ideas about what the undead should, and shouldn’t, do. George Romero, the filmmaker who re-created the modern horror film with his 1968 renegade black-and-white classic “Night of the Living Dead,” has his fifth sequel, “Survival of the Dead,” opening tonight at the Music Box Theatre in Chicago. Illness prevented Romero, 70, […]

Samantha, Carrie, Miranda and Charlotte (Kim Cattrall, Sarah Jessica Parker, Cynthia Nixon and Kristin Davis) return for more “Sex and the City” in a new sequel. You. Yeah, you! If you already have plans for a girls’ night out to see the new movie “Sex and the City 2,” don’t read this review. It’s not […]

Natasha and J (Barbara Mori and Hrithik Roshan) become fate-crossed lovers in the romance-action-thriller “Kites.” Every frame in the bold, breakthrough Bollywood movie “Kites” looks as if it’s been purloined from a heavy-breathing Victoria’s Secret commercial. Bodaciously beautiful bikini-bound babes practically pose while on a yacht with ripped and rippled men. The camera luxuriates in […]