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Aussie actor Russell Crowe tries on the tights, quivers and scabbards as the infamous English rogue “Robin Hood.” |
Zounds! What hath Ridley Scott done to ye old Robin Hood and his band of merry men?
You know, the beloved English outlaw who took from the rich and gave to the poor in one of history’s most celebrated redistribution of wealth programs?
This moody Robin Hood, played by mumbling Aussie Russell Crowe, suffers from repressed memories stemming from a traumatic childhood. No wonder his men have trouble working up a little merriment now and then.
Plus, this Robin Hood sports a graying beard, saggy eyes and paunchy tummy. He’s as old as a Medieval grandpa and he hasn’t even met maid Marion yet.
Speaking of Marion, she’s played by the perfectly enunciating Cate Blanchett.
She hasn’t been a maid in quite a while. But in the 10 years she’s been married to Crusades warrior Robert Loxley, she’s become a gifted farmer, fighter, archer, English speaker and feminist warrior.
Stand back. She wields one mean broadsword.
During a climactic battle on the English beach, she shows up wearing a fashionable knight’s suit just her size. (Where’d she get it? Armor R Us? Was she home-schooled in combat, or did she intern under an English knight?)
The idea of Robin and Marion getting together in their senior years has already been explored in Richard Lester’s 1976 movie “Robin and Marian” with Sean Connery and Audrey Hepburn. There’s nothing wrong with “Robin Hood” revisiting that concept, except that Scott’s movie is a legend origin tale that takes place before military archer Robin Longstride evolves into the outlaw Robin Hood. (Read more…)