|
Julia (Jennifer Garner) whispers sweet nothings to Reed (Ashton Kutcher) in the romantic comedy “Valentine’s Day.” |
“Valentine’s Day” – strategically released just before the title’s namesake holiday – presents 20 main characters or so in a constant, high-speed rotation on the silver screen.
All scramble to find romance, flowers, food and chocolates on Cupid’s busiest day of the year.
It’s just like a Quentin Tarantino movie, but without the time-shifted sequences, interesting characters, riveting dialogue and well-wrought action scenes.
Five things tell us that sitcom guru and Northwestern University grad Garry Marshall directed this film.
1. A camera lingers on a man’s sweatshirt bearing a “Northwestern” logo.
2. Hector Elizondo, whom Marshall considers his “good luck” charm, co-stars.
3. Floral explosions erupt on the screen (although none tops the one in Marshall’s 1991 “Frankie and Johnny”).
4. Marshall makes a Hitchcockian cameo as one of three string musicians.
5. “Valentine’s Day” is a mishmash of cutesy poo-ness, boring Hollywood clichés, semi-warm fuzzies, ham-handed song choices and a lot of squandered talent.
Sure, a few of the intertwined subplots are a hoot.
Singer Taylor Swift is the biggest surprise as a shallow, valley high school girl in love with a biceps-obsessed jock. (Read more…)